Remember that time you attended a conference—maybe it was on Anxiety in Church Leadership or Depression in Evangelical Youth—and the room was packed with theologians and psychologists? Do you recall that creeping sense of inadequacy as you defended theology in one conversation, then felt completely lost as psychology took over the next? Perhaps you wondered, Should I even be here? Navigating that unique and sometimes uncomfortable space between theology and psychology—the very place we call Christian counselling—can be tricky. It’s a space where we often feel pulled in both directions, trying to honor both faith and science, yet somehow knowing that we are called to blend them together for the sake of those we counsel.

Christian counselling is constantly scrutinized by both theology and psychology, with significant pressure coming from each side. There was a time when this really bothered me—maybe it was the fear of causing harm or of failing as a counsellor, or perhaps it was the overwhelming demand for counsellors calling out to me. My response to this tension was a desperate rush to equip myself in both theology and psychology, striving to offer a sound bio-psycho-social-spiritual service. The pressure mounted, the challenge was real, and the need for us to be out in the field even more pressing. But I quickly learned that the desire to honor God and serve others doesn’t allow us to ignore ethical excellence and sound practice. I soon realized how much I needed both theology and psychology; they became like parents guiding a young child.

Like all good parents, theology and psychology each have a purpose in their scrutiny and play unique roles at every stage of our journey as Christian counsellors—from our early beginnings to professional practice. In fact, perhaps we can borrow from Erikson’s¹ stages of development to reflect on our growth, from the “birth” of our calling to the maturity of our practice. As we progress, we begin to see the beauty and necessity of both theology and psychology, our guiding “parents,” shaping us at every step.

Erikson speaks of the infancy phase, the first stage of a child’s life (0–1 year), where trust is developed. Think back to those early days of learning Christian counselling. As intimidating as those practice role plays might have been, your foundational beliefs and teachings were being nurtured by your “parents,” theology and psychology. If you missed one—or both—of your parents during this time, you likely grew up in your practice with a sense of mistrust, not just of theology or psychology, but of anyone who questioned or challenged your approach. In these early stages, theology was building a foundation of trust through sound biblical teaching, while psychology introduced a healthy skepticism, prompting you to ask, “Why?” and “How do we know what we know?” This marked the beginning of your appreciation for empirical evidence. You had hope in your calling, and it was slowly being shaped through trust in the integration of theology and psychology.

In early childhood (ages 3–6), Erikson teaches that the virtue of will is developed as a child begins to assert their independence. The challenge of autonomy versus shame and doubt must be faced to move forward in growth. Perhaps you remember when you first started finding your footing in Christian counselling, experimenting with different models of practice and even blending ideas into an eclectic approach. It felt like you’d established a newfound sense of autonomy, didn’t it? Yet, even as you embraced independence, you were still deeply connected to your “parents,” theology and psychology. They weren’t constraints, but vital guides continuing to inform, support, and equip you. If you tried to shake them off too soon, shame and doubt could easily creep in, particularly if you hadn’t fully embraced your identity in Christ and your calling as a Christian counsellor. It’s important to remember that we aren’t theology or psychology themselves; they are our parents, still shaping us. We are Christian counsellors, made in God’s image, called to serve with Christ-centred ethics and excellence.

As we continue to grow, we enter the school age, where we confront feelings of inferiority while striving to embrace industry. This phase compels us to work towards competence, building our confidence in the calling we have chosen, all while remaining influenced and supported by both theology and psychology. Moving into adolescence, we often experience confusion as we grapple with our identity in the field. This is the time when we challenge established practices, explore alternatives, and dive deeper into our studies to uncover our specialization within Christian counselling. As we transition into early adulthood, we begin to make peace with our “parents,” enjoying a newfound intimacy in collaboration and mutual respect. It is in this space that we arrive at a destination rich with meaning and purpose. The love of God flows through us in our work, and we are privileged to witness lives transforming before our very eyes.

The beauty of being part of a family is that we understand everyone makes mistakes—even parents. The only real danger lies in rebelling against our “parents,” thereby losing the stability and safety of collaborative conversations that foster growth in our practice. Theology and psychology have their limitations and complexities, but we are undoubtedly better off together than apart, and I have learned to accept the challenges rather than orphan my practice. As our practice moves into middle age, we find ourselves contributing to society, where generativity takes precedence over stagnation. In this stage, our Christian counselling praxis not only ages with dignity and integrity but also matures the field for the next generation of practitioners, allowing them to flourish and pursue ethical excellence.

So, dear Christian counsellor, there is no need to fear the journey of your Christian counselling praxis; and I invite you to embrace the scrutiny. It is your calling: A Bible-based, Christ-centred, Spirit-led, and psychologically sound vocation that has grown through the developmental phases we’ve traversed together.

See you at the next conference!²

1. Erik Erikson (1902–1994) introduced the theory of psychosocial development. He posited that human development transpires in eight stages each one characterized by a conflict that must be overcome to develop a healthy personality. For his foundational work, see H. Erickson, Childhood and Society (London: Vintage, 1995).
2. I declare that this blog has employed the use of Generative Artificial Intelligence (GAI) and adheres to SATS’s Policy on Generative Artificial Intelligence (GAI). The GAI platform, ChatGPT 3.5 was used. The purpose of using the GAI tool was specifically limited to improving grammar, punctuation, sentence structure, and style, while maintaining my original ideas, contribution, and input.